The Weirdest Survey I Have Ever taken

This was sent to me by Mark. This is just too crazy…and so with that being said as a preface – my answers are going to be just as crazy too.

1. You can press a button that will make any one person explode. Who would you explode?
That could get me arrested for a federal offense. I’m not even putting into writing.
2. You can flip a switch that will wipe any band or musical artist out of existence. Which one will it be?
I have to agree with my friend, Mark: CELENE DION
3. Who would you really like to just punch in the face?
I don’t punch faces…I kick asses.
4. What is your favorite cheese?
cream - cream cheese
5. You can only have one kind of sandwich. Every sandwich ingredient known to humankind is at your immediate disposal. What does your dream-sandwich consist of, and does it contain the aforementioned cheese?
I’m still loving a Corned beef on Russian rye – meat piled thick, a slice of swiss cheese and a schmear of Club 10 dressing ( it’s like 1000 island but better.) Butter on the bread that is lightly toasted.
6. You have the opportunity to sleep with the movie-celebrity of your choice. We are talking no-strings-attached sex and it can only happen once (they will never call you back). Who is it?
This is a tough one, but after much thought…Richard Gere.I bet you thought I would say Colin Firth or John Cusack. But, I want those fellas to call me back.
7. You have the opportunity to sleep with the music-celebrity of your choice. Same rules as above. Who is it?
well if it was safe and no consequences, ( hey, rock stars have a reputation) I think: STING. Sting – a –ringa-ding-dong.
8. Now that you've slept with two different people in a row, you seem to be having an excellent day because you just came across a hundred-dollar bill on the sidewalk. Holy shit, a hundred bucks! How are you gonna spend it? (saving, investing and depositing do not count).
Go out with friends…and put the money towards the bill.
9. You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere. You have to depart right now. Where are you gonna go?
London, England
10. Upon arrival to the aforementioned location, you get off the plane and discover another hundred-dollar bill. Shit! Now that you are in the new location, where are you gonna go to spend that?
Is it a Euro, a pound or US Dollars. Say a pound…the exchange rate with the UK is alright at the mo. Mmm…at the Cadbury Chocolate Factory or at Harrods or at Boots, the Chemist’s and buy up tons of beauty products.
11. An angel appears out of Heaven and offers you a lifetime supply of the alcoholic beverage of your choice. "Be brand-specific" it says. Man! What are you gonna say about that? Even if you don't drink booze there's something you can figure out... so what's it gonna be?
ABSOLUTE…bliss or Dom Perrion
12. Rufus appears out of nowhere with a time-traveling phone booth. You can go anytime in the PAST. What time are you traveling to and what are you going to do when you get there?
I’m going to Paris in the roaring Twenties… the artists, the writers, the musicians. Total Bohemia.
Or…in the 30’s and I would be training as a Geisha
Or…in the 40’s and I would be a girl singer in a Swing band.
13. You discover a beautiful island upon which you may build your own society. You make the rules. What is the first rule you put into place?
To Quote my friend, Mark:
The first rule of Utopia Island is you do not talk about Utopia Island. The second rule of Utopia Island is YOU DO NOT TALK ABOUT UTOPIA ISLAND.
14. You have been given the opportunity to create the half-hour TV show of your own design. What is it called and what's the premise?
Can I do a reality show starring my dad? Ging-lish 101.
15. What is your favorite expletive?
It’s a noun, verb, adjective, adverb…FUCKNow, I come from a family that has English and communication backgrounds. One day, we decided to use said word and be able to diagram the sentence with the F word as that part of the sentence. We still have yet to figure out how it can be used as a prepositional phrase.
16. One night you wake up because you heard a noise. You turn on the light to find that you are surrounded by MUMMIES. The mummies aren't really doing anything, they're just standing around your bed. What do you do?
Teach them how to sing and dance. Think Motown people…they become really really good and we take the act on the road and make millions. And being mummies, they don’t need anything so the cash and bling are all mine!!!
17. Your house is on fire, holy shit! You have just enough time to run in there and grab ONE inanimate object. Don't worry, your loved ones and pets have already made it out safely. So what's the one thing you're going to save from that blazing inferno?
MY CDs
18. The Angel Of Death has descended upon you. Fortunately, the Angel Of Death is pretty cool and in a good mood, and it offers you a half-hour to do whatever you want before you bite it. Whatcha gonna do in that half-hour?
Do a mass email and call all of my family and friends and tell them I love them and goodbye.
19. You accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what's even cooler is that they endow you with the super-power of your choice! What's it gonna be?
I could turn all evil into good and piss off a whole bunch of evil doers in the process.
20. You can re-live any point of time in your life. The time-span can only be a half-hour, though. What half-hour of your past would you like to experience again?
The first time I sang as Bette Midler at a huge benefit and sat on Jake Leinenkugel’s lap. ( Yes the Beer Barron Jake Leinenkugel. – he’s kinda cute too.) My singing rocked that night and the dress I was wearing made the “girls” look great.
21. You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be? (the answer "nothing" doesn't count)
1992 or 1997 …then again this past year, if you checked out my blog, was not a real treat.
22. You got kicked out of the country for being a time-traveling heathen who sleeps with celebrities and has super-powers. But check out this cool shit... you can move to anywhere else in the world! Bitchin'! What country are you going to live in now?
Ireland. A thatched cottage on the West Coast of Ireland and only a few blocks from the local pub. My name will be changed and my hair dyed red. I’m pale enough to be Irish.
23. This question still counts, even for those of you who are under age. Check it out. You have been eternally banned from every single bar in the world except for ONE. Which one is it gonna be?
Come on!THE ANCHOR in Superior. Good times, cheap imports, wonderful burgers and they have a piano there too. I’ll just have to teach the boys there how to make a martini.
24. Hopefully you didn't mention this in the super-powers question.... If you did, then we'll just expand on that. Check it out... Suddenly, you have gained the ability to FLOAT!!! Whose house are you going to float to first, and be like "Dude check it out I can fucking FLOAT!"
Gina’s… and I’ll freak out her dogs and then float on over to my parent’s house and say “Look Ma, I can float”
25. The constant absorption of magical moonbeams mixed with the radioactive vegetables you consumed earlier have given you the ability to resurrect the dead famous-person of your choice. So which late celebrity will you bring back to life?That’s tough.
My short list: Jesus, Princess Diana, Eva Cassidy, Jim Henson, and for my sister: Elvis.I thought about Hitler just to bitch slap him and ask him “what the hell were you thinking?” but he’s just to evil to even give the time of day to.
26. The Celestial Gates Of Beyond have opened, much to your surprise because you didn't think such a thing existed. Death appears. As it turns out, Death is actually a pretty cool entity, and happens to be in a fantastic mood. Death offers to return the friend/family-member/person/etc. of your choice to the living world. Who will you bring back?
My guardian angel, Kelly. WWKJSD?
27. What's your theme song?
Walking on Sunshine or Blame it on my Youth.

Now how's that for funky?!?